Elijahs Cup by Valerie Paradiz

Author:Valerie Paradiz
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Published: 2002-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

Over the course of several months, as Elijah's stays at Brook-side Cottage become more frequent and regular, we go into Houst's and add new layers of experience to his social repertoire. Soon he is saying the word “helium” all day long, pressing me to engage with him in repetitious talk about “helium balloons” that “float in the sky” and “air balloons” that “stay on the ground.” After countless trips to the general store, the tedious social formulas of “hello” and “bye-bye” and “What color do you want?” become less nerve-racking for him. Elijah even chats the checkout lady up, saying five choice syllables the moment he walks in the door: “Heeee. liiii . um baaa. looooon.” Then he makes a beeline for the bins.

“What color are you going to choose today?” the woman calls out as he passes by the counter with no answer. He's now making his selection all by himself and brings it back to the cash register without my prompting.

One day, as the woman and I waited for him to return to the counter, I revealed to her that my son was autistic. I thought our camaraderie with her had made it safe.

“There's nothing wrong with him! He's perfectly healthy! ” she challenged me, incredulous that I would suggest such a thing.

I fumbled for an answer. “Well . of course there's nothing wrong. He's autistic. That's why we come in here all the time.” I had hoped to enlighten her about our ritual, but she just shook her head in disbelief.

That's the day I learned about invisibility and how far Elijah could depart from neurotypicality and seem to go unnoticed. Friends even criticized me for falling victim to “those awful labels that only stigmatize the child,” but I found their remarks overly simplistic. Sure, I had my bone to pick with condescending language, but not with the word “autism” itself. Such quickness to deny or minimize Elijah's way of life were insulting in the early years, before I learned that I would have to let go of public ignorance the same way Elijah lets go of his balloons.

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